Poking, grabbing, belly harassing. Laughing, slapping and taunting. They love to minimize and underestimate what they cannot understand. All because I’m not like them! All they see is fat, all I feel is bad. 16 plus years and still going, no signs of stopping are showing. Times like these call for a change I can never seem to make. Another humiliation ritual, how much more will I take? It all depends on me and all comes down to what I am willing to do. Anything just to be seen the same as you.

If the day ever comes they should congratulate me on my success, I’ll smile and say thanks but will not soon forget what happened yesterday and what was done and what has been said. People are shallow because they prefer their own, in mindset, body weight, in similar proportions of skin and bone. We all judge and we do it everyday but if some of us could at least keep the judgments more subtle, then few others would feel so alone.

What is the purpose? What was the point? Besides the obvious difference, what makes it feel alright? You don’t have to like me and on some level I feel shocked but at least I can thank god that the guesswork was already solved. Blatant and shocking you grab and poke and prod. Between you and me, you are the one that is odd for touching and rubbing another man’s bod.

If you can’t keep your hands to yourself, I have serious panic attacks to think about how far you might take it with somebody else. Perhaps in a dark alleyway or somewhere else, another person’s trust and “innocence” you’d probably take, but in jail you’d be the one who cries and swears it was a one time mistake. So keep your body snatching, fat grabbing hands away from my mental scars or soon you can expect a visit from HR!